brb dying

So basically, the universe is out to get me. And I'm quite sure of this. Allow me to explain.

So first of all, I've been coughing for weeks. In fact, I started coughing right around when I started visiting colleges, which is absolutely excellent in and of itself, especially during interviews. It really shows personality. Admissions officers particularly enjoy it when either you spend several seconds coughing because you can't quiiiiiite get that mucus out of your throat, or when you have trouble speaking at the beginning of your answer to every question. You look really confident and outgoing. It's just the best. Word to the wise.

My coughing has gotten even more vigorous in the last week, which is pretty obnoxious basically all the time. I have been told by both men and women alike that it is disgusting. I'm sorry. Since it's my fault, I'll try to fix it. I didn't mean to inconvenience anyone. But anyway. It's especially obnoxious because apparently, in the last two days, I have been coughing so frequently and so vigorously that as a result of my lurching forward and apparently slightly contorting myself, I managed to throw out my back. That's right. I threw out my back by coughing too hard.

I noticed a slight backache last night, and decided that it hurt enough that my best course of action was just to go to bed, and in the morning it should be better.
NOPE.
NOPE.
NOPE THAT'S NOW HOW THINGS WORK.
SORRY GREG IT'S NOT THAT EASY.
When I woke up this morning my back was in even more pain than it had been when I went to sleep. Whenever I slightly turned my back, random muscles - there seemed to be no rhyme nor reason as to which ones - would start to ache terribly.

On top of that, I could feel that I was losing my voice. I was starting to sense a bit of that the night before, but now it was pretty bad. There was nothing to warrant taking a sick day, though, so I muscled through (get it because my muscles were inconveniencing me anyway) and carried on with my day as best as I could.

Perhaps the worst part was that this morning on my way to physics, I GOT THE GODDAMN HICCUPS. And that's not it. I GOT THE GODDAMN HICCUPS DURING A GODDAMN COUGH ATTACK. Have you ever had the hiccups while doubled over (with a pained back, I remind you) in a coughing fit while walking? It sucks.

[There is currently a half-finished picture of me keeling over in the middle of the hallway saved on my computer. Someday it will be here instead of this placeholder.]

So now I'm also losing my voice quite terribly. I tried singing a bit, and that didn't work at all. And I have one more college visit on Friday. That means I have to save my voice so that I don't walk in completely mute. That means I have to go on vocal rest. Minimal talking if any at all. And I'm the worst person in the world for that to happen to, considering that I am constantly talking and that a fair amount of the time I prefer to yell. So wish me luck; I'll try to keep you posted on how it goes. Hint: probably pretty poorly.